I won't mention everything that has been going on, but it's been rough. I broke up with my girlfriend (a decision that I did not want to make), I'm stressed because of my lack of money, I've been fighting with my mom quite a bit lately, and everything is kind of piling up all at the same time. It really sucks. I have the best job in the entire world. However, I make $30-$40 a week. So realistically, it is not the best job in the world. And my parents have been hounding me to find a new one.
I have been blessed with the opportunity to (possibly) work at FedEx/Kinko's in Bartlett (which is a tight job). It would require me to work longer hours that I work now. Which is awesome, because I get more money. But I will be super stressed running from work to school and back and everything. And balancing church, school, my band, and my job will be hard. But faith and hope exists, friends.
Jesus is pretty cool.
After the past couple of weeks, I have leaned on Jesus more than ever. I drove up to WBC a few weeks ago. I spent the whole time with the Lord, and praying and reflecting on my life. And I realized that God had taken the back burner. I always said that Jesus was first, but He really wasn't. And it sucks to think about that.
It's crazy that we just take God for granted. We treat Him as a tire iron.
Yes, a tire iron.
So you're driving down the freeway, and you can feel/hear your tire going flat. Oh, snap! So you pull over, and you attempt to replace your flat tire. You kind of panic at first, but you remember, "Oh yeah! I have a tire iron!" So you to your trunk and pull out your jack/tire iron/spare tire. So you use these things, and replace your tire. Then you put everything back in the trunk, and continue driving.
The tire iron is real handy when you need it. Real handy. But when you don't have a flat tire, it just takes up space in your trunk.
Tire iron. Jesus. Does it make sense?
Jesus was my tire iron for a long time. I'm sick of Jesus being a steel rod in my life. I want to make Jesus a living, breathing, existent, prevalent being in my life. Not just a dude I go to when life sucks.
I can feel God becoming more prevalent.
My college schedule is really manic. I have like an hour or so in between each class. So I'm driving a lot. I spend that time with the Lord. It takes 12-16 minutes to get to the college from my house. That's time spent praying, talking to God, listening to God-centered music, reflecting on my day, the sins I committed, what I could've done differently, everything. I'm growing closer to God.
I think that I should blog more often. My friend Cody inspired me to continue blogging. He also introduced me to some awesome music (I will mention that shortly). I want to try and blog at the end of each week as a reflective thing. And for those that are reading, I hope that you can find some sort of inspiration or hope from reading these blogs. God bless you.
Thanks for reading.
Listening to:
Hillsong United - A_CROSS // THE_EARTH: Tear Down the Walls
This Will Destroy You - Young Mountain
Caspian - Four Trees
Mae - The Everglow
